5:06 pm | 12 December 2002 | someone is getting a LUMP of COAL

...wherein the Tape Wizard and yours truly get a little punchy.

Tape Wizard: dude, you are so not 5'9". whatEVER. i'm 5'7 3/4" tall. you=minimally larger than i, therefore you can't be pushing 5'8 1/2". yeah, take that.

Stormyclaude: dude! i'm 5'10"! i so am! i am way tall!!!!

Tape Wizard: we shall see little woman, we shall see. THIS CHRISTMAS: YOU. ME. YARD STICK. BE THERE.

Stormyclaude: all i know is, Narkleptic's DRIVERs LICENSE says he's 5'10", and i'm taller'n him. The State of California says i am!!

Tape Wizard: Narkie lied then. he l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-li-lied.

Stormyclaude: No cheating with your big hair!!!!

Tape Wizard: ME?? BIG HAIR?? i'm offended, because although my hair is robust and plenty in its population, it is NOT big. granted, it does at times make a triangle shape, as the bottom fluffs out, but this would not contribute to height. take it back!

Stormyclaude: whatever bride of frankenstein

Tape Wizard: shut up tiffani. or should i call you amber? what's the point of two first names, anyhow? [ooh! a masterful allegation to my supposed teenage resemblance to Tiffani-Amber Thiessen!]

Stormyclaude: i don't know TRISHELLE [i quickly return the parry with a reference to the most hated member of the Real World Las Vegas, the heinous booty ho Trishelle, whose name is like some inbred cousin to the Tape Wizard's]

Tape Wizard: if we're gonna play this game, then i'll just leave it at this: ____. [Oh no she didn't! She used my real name! My birth, i-don't-go-by-that name! Augh! and no, it's not "Chad"!]

Stormyclaude: oh no you didn't!!! paybacks are hell, muffin.

Tape Wizard: dont call me muffin, flapjacks. besides, i'm not the one who's too cool FOR HER OWN NAME.

Stormyclaude: that's right, you aren't that cool.

Tape Wizard: i'm just cool enough, thank you very much. and besides, a two syllable name IS cooler than a three.

Stormyclaude: i'm calling you triss-ee-uh from now on

Tape Wizard: see what i care, CLAW-dia

Stormyclaude: you should be nice to your big sister. SANTA'S WATCHING, BITCHES

Tape Wizard: is santa a 6 foot tall amelie wannabe in chicago?

Stormyclaude: DAMN vicious!!!!!

Tape Wizard: you know i'm joking i hope.

Stormyclaude: ohhhh NOW she's nice. just like the kitten at work was nice...AFTER I PUT IT IN THE FILE CABINET FOR HALF AN HOUR!! IT CAN HAPPEN TO YOU TOOO!!!!

Tape Wizard: and just you try to sticfk me a file cabinet. i'll show you whats up.

Stormyclaude: not only will i try to "sticfk" you in one, i will succeed at "sticfking" you in one, and then you'll show me that what's up is YOUR TIME AS A FREE PERSON.

Tape Wizard: hey, beotch, its not my goddamn fault this computer lab has ZERO heat and my fingers feel like the frozen fish sticks your momma fed you every day and every night. STICK that somewhere.

Stormyclaude: ass

Tape Wizard: they dont call me evil for nothing.

Stormyclaude: yeah, well, they don't call you "the Punctuation Master" either

Tape Wizard: SHOVE IT!and, try to catch me. guess i'm running out of witty rebuttals. time for econ, i'll meet YOU in the street later. RUMBLE!!!