10:31 am | 12 May 2003 | back in full effect y'all

Um, i am too schized-out to give you all a good and proper entry with a detailed rundown of this weekend's stupendousness, but here are a few figures for you:

Glasses of Jameson drunk: 16
Glasses of Tullamore Dew when the Jamie ran out: 2
Glasses of Bushmill, generously donated by someone who didn't know that "whiskey" means "Jameson" in le Monde du Claude: 1
Large red plastic cups of Jameson: 3/4 (i was sharing)
Mojitos: 3
Bottles of wine with pictures of sheep on them: 1
Margaritas with salt: 1
Stella Artois(eses): 4
Average hours of sleep per night: 3
Number of "devil's-horns" hand gestures made: approx. 45
Number of times rocked out publicly and hard to "Don't Fear the Reaper": 1
Number of Chicago Fire games seen: 1
Number of times yelled some variation of "You suck, asshole!" at Chicago Fire game: 12
Times called Tape back in Michigan, only to have her slur into the phone: "Is this my SISTER? It IS! I'm so waaaaasted": 1
Times hyperventilated because hilarious friends were impersonating Christopher Walken and it was cracking my shit up: 3
Times hyperventilated because hilarious friends were impersonating Jarvis Cocker and it was turning me on: 2
Homestar Runner references made: 1,000
Number of times Neal Pollack made some allusion to he and i needing to get it on: 3
Fun had: 14 litres

I hope everyone's weekends were at least 1/10 as great. And i love you all, my wonderful friends. Partying like the bastard daughter of Iggy Pop and Andrew W.K., i remain yours: clm.

A quick IM excerpt:

stormy: how was the party?
tape: i had $8 in bottle returns
that's 80 bottles
thats a lot of booze. oh god, the house was trashed dude.
its on video i think. nightmonkey videotaped the bar in disaster
stormy: oh mannn. did anything get broken?
tape: no, nothing. just my left hip b/c i fell off the trampoline. and also a few boys' hearts, because i will not call them
stormy:YES!!!
tape:i'm such a bitch. but you know its like, i can tell you now, i don't like you, so i'm saving both the time and energy that comes later down the road when i have to dump you
stormy: you dangerous VIXEN--practical AND seductive! you are the ultimate Virgo! i applaud you!
tape: ha thanks. its not all that great though. i'm pretty much a 20-year-old with the experience of Bobby the 1st grader: he's only flashed his junk to some classmates, and even then he got in trouble.